Maturity and disillusion


Last November I reached 40 years old.  Lately I’ve been looking back and feeling nostalgic and a bit unhappy with how I feel about some of my hobbies and the stuff I used to get really excited about.  Maybe the world has changed or I’ve just changed which is more likely … but finding things that really pinch my enthusiasm is getting harder and harder.  I continue to love movies and video games but the excitement I had either as a kid or even a young adult has lessened to some degree, and well, I sometimes even feel I’m going through the motions.  That feeling has also bled into my day to day life occasionally.

In recent years I’ve pretty much turned my back on writing, especially fiction writing although I can still exercise that interest with my writing on the blog – but that’s different than putting a story together, coming up with situations and creating characters.  I have several stories spanning many chapters that I am proud of but I look back on them like they come from a world I no longer belong to.  I’ve let other things enter my head, other responsibilities and distractions to such an extent that I can’t even bring myself to attempt fiction writing anymore.  It makes me sad to look back, to think of the hours and the passion I used to put into that part of my life, but now barely recognise it.

I think this disillusion is a lot to do with getting older, maturing and having work and responsibilities, but it’s a shame I feel I can’t relate to some hobbies or even approach them with the same level of excitement I once did.  The same goes for music which I used to be passionate about but that has left me feeling cold and bored apart from a small handful of artists.  The same also goes for relationships or the idea of one … where I have been hurt in my search and now feel so ‘meh’ about the whole subject I can’t find the energy to attempt it again.  Also this information overload / social media world we live in breeds contempt when everything that is thrown at you is thrown at you by the bucket load and I just end up feeling overwhelmed, unable to focus.  There is a heck of a lot of superficiality to everything these days it seems … and entertainment, celebrity and life in general has at times felt cheapened as a result.

Yet that’s not to say there isn’t some merit to be found, it just feels a much rarer commodity to really get excited about a TV show or a game or a movie, and then to want to talk about it.  Occasionally I have to force myself to find things to say even about a subject I really love.  Luckily I still manage to get there, to write something interesting (I hope) and to keep this blog going.  But lately it’s getting easier and easier to just be lazy and let the entertainment wash over me with hardly any concentration.  Life can get me down, it can be stressful and particularly tiring and I long to be younger sometimes and have no other worries and just indulge myself in my own little world.  Hey, I liked it there.

But I suppose we all have to grow up.  Only thing is, for some it can suck big time.  That’s why adults tell children to enjoy being young – it really is the best years of your life.

Craig.

Advertisements

Birthday fun and reflection


Well I turned 39 yesterday and it was a really enjoyable day, despite the fact I was at work.  I am fortunate to have many really good colleagues and friends at work and they all made a fuss of me, giving me cards, prezzies etc.  I also had money and gifts off my family which included the ‘Atlas Limited Edition’ of Call of Duty Advanced Warfare for Xbox One as well as the official, limited edition Call of Duty Xbox One control pad.  The game itself seems pretty decent but I’ll report more on that in another post.

DSC_0132

At times like this, especially as I approach forty, I certainly find myself reflecting on life, and especially the past year, which emotionally has been very up and down.  Some people come into your life and have a dramatic effect on it, then before you know it, they are gone for good.  It’s certainly hard when that happens but sometimes can’t be avoided.  Yet when I look to the things I have managed to achieve, the loving family I have around me, and the genuine friends who are still in my life, I do realise I have a lot to be thankful for.

I love writing this blog, I love watching movies, playing games, and I love my job … it challenges me and makes my life something once upon a time I never thought it would be.

I also want to thank anyone who regularly reads my posts, occasional visitors and the community here as a whole.  You’re a joy to write for and make this a very rewarding hobby.

Adding to the collection


Have I ever told you guys I collect PVC statues?  Mostly of the Japanese anime and fantasy art style, female characters is various sexy poses with elaborate costumes and props.  In my experience some have looked on this collection as strange, but I think they are really cool.  I don’t particularly see them as sexual, but more a very appealing art-style that has made such things as Japanese Anime the phenomenon it has become.  Find below just a few pictures of some of my favourites in my collection, and feel free to post your thoughts.

Dark Elf

DSC_0047_edited

DSC_0048_edited

DSC_0053_edited

A milestone reached


After starting this blog back in 2007, I never really did it to become all that popular … I wrote for my own love of writing and my love of movies, games and just getting my opinion out there.  However in recent months and with the involvement of other blogs that I follow, there has been a growing interest here in what I am posting.  That is such an amazing thing to me, that someone would actually want to read my stuff, let alone come back time and time again.  So with a recent milestone reached of 250 followers here and that’s not including those that still visit but haven’t clicked the subscribe button, I want to express my gratitude and sheer joy of having you all on board.  It makes writing this not just a hobby I love, but also something I am doing for an awaiting community – something I never thought possible.  Please continue to comment, like and read my posts and I will promise to continue to post interesting, fun and informative reviews, as well as whatever else comes to mind.

Thank you so much for the support!

Craig.